From [email protected] Wed Dec 27 23:25:29 EST 1995
Article: 85941 of alt.sex.movies
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From: "G.S."
Newsgroups: alt.sex.movies
Subject: REVIEW: "Many Happy Returns"
Date: Tue, 26 Dec 1995 00:06:48 -0500 (EST)
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Status: RO
MANY HAPPY RETURNS
directors: Jane Waters + Harold Lime, 1995 Nitro
rating: 2.25
- Dallas, Jake Williams
- Jeanna Fine (anal), Vince Vouyer
- Houston, Steven St.Croix
- Jeanna Fine, Holly Body
- Nikki Sinn, Jake Williams
It's Tom's (Jake Williams) birthday. Wallowing in self pity, we find out
what his story's about; he's just moved into a "great looking, funky old
house" (which, by the way, looks very big from what we can see - it must've
been handed over to him or something because from the way Jake's character
is presented, all scrawny and tired-looking (or is it just perfect
typecasting?), I'd be surprised if he could afford to take a bath) and his
girlfriend and buddies are nowhere to be seen. He celebrates by reading a
Playboy when the doorbell suddenly rings. Enter Gail (Dallas), a stripper
hired by some of Tom's friends, who begins to sing out 'Happy Birthday To
You'. There's something about Dallas that reminds me of Dalny Marga (from
my review of "The Bottom Line"). I think it's the fact that she has a cute
way about her... but, the same I mentioned that Dalny couldn't act her way
out of a paper bag, Dallas can't sing her way out of a candy wrapper. She
does begin to carry a good tune, but at the same time as she hits a high
note, she also hits rock bottom. Also, what gives with the stage name
'Dallas'? Couldn't she think of anything original? I mean, there was an
early '90s Vivid starlet of the same name and both D'Amour and St.Claire
have sometimes been billed simply as Dallas, it just adds to the confusion.
Anyhow, she strips a little (she has an ok-looking, dancer's body, I'll give
her that much - with medium sized boobs, however fake) then starts touching
Tom and it looks like she helps him 'break in' his new home.
---
After Dallas strips away her flimsy bikini, she starts dancing around and
lets her boobs dangle on Jake's face. He starts licking and sucking on them.
Later, Jake undresses and Dallas gives him a very slow-moving blowjob. She
smiles and he gives facial expressions like it's the most incredible thing
he's experiencing, but you can tell he just wants to get it over with.
Dallas barely whimpers as she lays on her back on a couch while Jake licks
her clit. She becomes a bit more vocal when they fuck doggie style, Jake
slipping on a condom. Then they fuck mish-style and before you know it, she's
asking him to cum all over her tits, which he does. Not much heat packed
here, you may want to FF through this scene.
---
An hour or two later. Tom is sitting around in his living room when the
doorbell rings. Enter Nina (Houston), a topless maid, another gift hired by
Tom's friends. Houston looks her prettiest here; she's wearing black
stockings, a short black mini-skirt, black heels, a black corset with her
breasts hanging out, a small white apron around her waist, a lace-band around
her neck and a white little tiara-like bonnet pulling the braided hair away
>from her face which makes her look very cute; at least we can see her entire
face rather than having those braids hang down and cover it up most of the
time. Nina looks around and tells Tom the place is a dump. The doorbell
rings again (actually it doesn't but it's supposed to - Jake suddenly jumps
up to answer the door in the middle of his conversation, so we can see the
editor wasn't completely focused on his/her work) and standing there is his
girlfriend Donna (Nikki Sinn). Donna hands Tom a birthday present and they
start kissing, when she notices Nina and gets upset. Tom and Donna rush
upstairs and leave Nina to her work when the doorbell rings again. I don't
think I've ever been annoyed by the sound of a doorbell until this (perhaps
I should thank the editor for having left out that one ring, heck, s/he was
probably annoyed by all of them too!). Nina goes for the door to find
Suzanne (Jeanna Fine), Billy (Vince Vouyer) and Cliff (Steven St.Croix)
standing there. We find out these two guys have been sending over Tom's
female gifts, plus Suzanne, a topless masseuse. Nina tells them he's
upstairs with his girlfriend then Billy asks Suzanne if he can take Tom's
massage for him. Without wasting any time, Suzanne pinches his ass and asks
him, "Weren't you telling me about THIS muscle right here that needs a little
working on..?" and they disappear into the next room. Nina and Cliff head on
out themselves. In the next room, Suzanne and Billy lay on top of a pool
table with Suzanne rolling balls off of Billy's ass, trying to sink them in
the corner pockets (oook!). Suzanne starts massaging his ass, then starts
kissing it and Billy tells her it's the muscle on the 'other' side that
really needs working on.
---
Jeanna starts things off with a fast-paced blowjob, complete with ball sucking
and deep throating. Although Jeanna doesn't look her finest here, she still
packs a good punch. She keeps at it a few minutes more and Vince is so horny
to fuck her, he doesn't even take the time to have a taste of her pussy, he
just dives right into her, mish-style. Then they get into the spoon position
and later he fucks her ass with a condom on (we don't see the initial
penetration shot). At times, Jeanna's facial expressions make her look tense
but for the most part they smile at eachother and are having fun. Vince
finishes things off with a facial cumshot; some of it landing on Jeanna's
chin and the rest she swallows.
---
Outside, Nina and Cliff are walking along when Nina tells him she's more of an
indoor girl than an outdoor girl. Cliff tells her she needs a break from her
usual routine and then he leads her to a grassy part of the backyard where he
lays out a blanket and they end up doing more than a little weed-picking.
---
Houston and Steven have a nice 'couples-oriented' kind of scene that is not
too fast and not too slow. They start off with somewhat passionate kissing,
then he slowly undresses her. He kisses the back of her neck then makes his
way down to her breasts. She lays on her back as he softly explores her
pussy with his tongue. She gives him a fair blowjob before Steven slips on
a condom and they do it doggie style. Good camera angles capture the heat
that is sensually burning between them. For the finale, they do it
mish-style with Steven picking up the pace as he plunges deep inside of her.
He climbs up over her face and cums, most of it missing her kisser. But she
does pucker up and give him a peck to end the scene.
---
In Tom's bedroom, he and Donna are kissing on his bed. The doorbell rings
again (sigh..) and when Tom runs down to answer it, he finds his ex-girlfriend
Carla (Holly Body, whose soft voice reminds me very much of K.C. Williams) who
decided to pay him a little visit for his birthday. Donna comes down to find
out what's going on and Tom tries to pass Carla off as another gift his
buddies sent him. Donna rushes back upstairs and Tom runs after her. Carla
sticks around and, in a depressed mood, wanders into the living room where she
sits down on a couch. Suzanne enters the room and they greet eachother. Carla
tells her she's Tom's ex-girlfriend with a talent for bad timing and Suzanne
tries to cheer her up by giving her a massage. Well, as you know, this turns
into more than a little 'topless' massage...
---
This could have been a very hot g/g scene, but it barely fizzled (we can thank
Holly for that). Things start out slow and sensual, Jeanna gently massaging
Holly's body. Holly looks very relaxed and you can tell Jeanna's slowly
growing wild, from the gestures of clenching her teeth and her eyes lighting
up with intensity as if she wanted to pounce Holly like a lion. Jeanna
probably figured Holly couldn't handle the frenzy of what she really wanted
to offer her, so she licked Holly's clit mildly. When it was Holly's turn
to taste Jeanna, she did it mildly too, and you can sense Jeanna's frustration
of wanting much more. It'll make you just want to jump into your screen and
push Holly aside and give Jeanna what she really wants (I know, I'm years off
on this thought :-). The scene ends too quickly, but for Jeanna's sake, I'd
say it was for the best.
---
Back in Tom's bedroom, he tries to convince Donna that there will be no more
topless gifts. He tries to convince her to stay and when she finally gives
in, they start making up only to be disturbed again by a knock at the bedroom
door by Billy telling Tom to come downstairs for one final surprise. Tom
yells out (without anyone noticing the name mistake), "Ok, Bobby, I'll be
right down!". Anyhow, Tom and Donna make their way downstairs to the living
room where everybody stands around and cheer out "Happy Birthday!" and
present him with a cake. A fed-up Donna thanks everyone for what they've
done and then sends them all out. Tom and Donna start making up again then
head upstairs, where she finishes giving him his birthday present (let me get
this straight - Jake has his cake.. but would rather eat Nikki? She IS a
'sinn' as far as I'm concerned, and I'm not talking about a wicked indulgence,
but that's just my opinion :-).
---
Nikki and Jake look eager to please eachother. What stalls things is the
undressing part, but once the clothes come off, they become unleashed. Ok,
so Nikki seems to have lost a little eagerness but Jake's really into his
character Tom, who's still dealing with the frustration of not receiving his
girlfriend's birthday gift yet. They suck eachother, eventually doing a 69
and Nikki does a little deep-throat. Jake wildly fingers her clit, then she
reverse-cowgirls him. He pumps deep and fast but some bad shots of Nikki's
flabby ass kinda ruins the heat. They fuck doggie style next, Jake trying
to re-build the heat again but by now it's too late, then he goes over to
her face and cums mainly on her chin. Fade out on Nikki laying on her back
as she continues sucking on Jake's limp dick.
---
I don't know if it was just my copy of the movie, but the tape ended during
the closing credits. Anyhow, a cute little story idea carried out well by
everyone involved (technical-wise things were ok and Dr. Sammy Shears'
musical score was good). At least there were no slow-motion shots during the
sex and Jeanna Fine has 2 scenes. No real flaws to report and everything was
decent, making this movie an average outing from the folks at Nitro. "Many
Happy Returns" doesn't have many hot spots to ultimately satisfy, but it will
suffice for fans of Jeanna Fans plus up-and-coming new star, Houston.
[email protected] - G.S. (aka Jo E.)