The Director Reviews... Legend III

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Legend Productions, 199?
Dir. Scotty Fox

Cast

Sandra Scream, Ashlyn Gere, Raven, Ashley Nicole, Randy West, Woody Long, Mike Horner, Steve Drake, (Lauren Hall, Sabrina Dawn appear in brief clips)

This video picks up sometime after Legend 2 ended. You need not see one to see the other. At the end of Legend 2, Lauren Hall is on the cusp of mega-pornstar-dom. Legened 3 begins after Lauren has retired. Randy West, playing uber-agent Cleve North, searches for the new "Legend".

Lauren Hall/Mike Horner

We start out in a screening room. Randy, his assistant Sandra and his actors Mike and Woody screen some gratuitous footage of Lauren Hall getting boffed by Mike Horner from Legend 2 (I think, maybe 1). It's an abridgement of the original scene, and ends with a cumshot on her ass and back. An energetic loop. Reminds me of how much I miss Lauren Hall.

Ashley Nicole/Steve Drake

Randy and Sandra hold auditions for the next legend. In walk Ashley and Steve. "Hi Beautiful, what's your name?" asks Randy. "I'm Paul." says Steve. I'm giggling at this point. Then sex is had. It's your standard suck/fuck scene with a slight twist... double pop shot, (most) likely a stunt cock. First, Steve blows a pretty healthy load on Ashley's belly. Then we cut to Ashley blowing "Steve." He cums again, this time smattering her face, resulting in an okay facial (all from a girl who managed to avoid cum altogether in the Gang Bang Girl, parts 5 and 6.)

It turns out that they work exclusively with other, can only fuck on the second Saturday of the month, before a full moon, and would like an advace on their first scene. Randy has an advance for them... advance them right out the door! :)

So, in comes lat interview for the day, Ashlyn Gere, looking frumpy in sweats, glasses and her hair pulled back. Of course, she's a "flat-chested" plump virgin... but its amazing what a little plastic surgery and exercise can do... So Randy takes her to "Richard Simmon's Fan Club Presdient", Mike Horner.

Mike does his usual entertaining fey guy thing. He gets Ashyln all trim and slim. Except, she still has no tits. Never fear, Randy has the "Breast-o-Matic" a bicycle-pump like contraption that gives Ashlyn the inflated boobs she always wanted.

Mike Horner/Ashlyn Gere

What becomes a porn star most, except to lose her virginity wth Mike Horner in a spirited scene. There's a lot of ball sucking going on (in the previous scene too, come to think of it) and oral action is pretty hot. There's your normal three positions then pop shot. While watching this scene, I was a little distracted ;-) , so I forget where the pop shot was. Sorry :(

Ashyln Gere/Woody Long

Ah, it's shooting day. Woody is Hamlet and Ashlyn is Queen Bubbles. However, Woody memorized all her lines, and Ashlyn gets camera shy. No scene ensues... Boo...

Randy and Sandra are back in the screening room, looking at footage of Sabrina Dawn from Legend I (I think). Randy has lost his new legend, and what's a poor porn producer to do? Not call in the "Black Widow!" Yes, the Black Widow shows up and demands to be the new legend. Randy gets away and the Black Widow sets her sights on Sandra...

Sandra Scream/Raven

A pretty lame lez scene. I love Raven, and Sandra gets me going too, but here Raven was too made up, her hair was too big. She had a spider web pencil ^H^H^H tattooed in her pubic region. It doesn't seem she really likes girls, that she just does it... oh well. The scene is lukewarm, with the right amount of theatrics thrown in...

While the Black Widow recuperates from Sandra's session, Sandra don's the Queen Bubbles costume, and is on her way to becoming a legend!

Woody Long/Sandra Scream

Like we couldn't see this coming... Lots of oral play and ball sucking (I sense a leit motif). She may get a finger or two (of her own) up her ass, but its hard to tell if there was actual penetration.

The action is missionary then doggy, then missionary again... ending with a great Woody Long pop shot n her face. If you like hearing girls ask for cum on their face, this scene is for you! And Woody obliges too. A little splashy, but a decent payoff.

Ashlyn Gere/Raven/Randy West

What are two semi-legends to do? Ashlyn and Raven are upset that they're not the legends, so they take it out on Randy's dick.

One sucks while the other does... something, its hard to tell. This looks like a textbook case of a lot of unusable footage being edited in Henry Bosco fashion into something resembling a porn scene. Everything is heavily strobed and digitized and there is not a lot of "live" sound.

The girls avoid each other when dealing with Randy. Ashlyn gets fucked while Raven sits on her face. This position lasts the rest of the (short) scene when Randy blows a most un- Randylike wad on Ashlyns twat and thighs.

I like Scotty Fox. When he's got a Cash Markman script and Henry Bosco editing, he turns out some of the most "sitcom" funny stuff around. It's not Letterman funny, but it is Al Bundy funny.

The music in this one was a little on the obtrusive side, they could have Faux Pas turned down a notch and still made it all work...

S. Andrew made some remarks not too long ago about Henry Bosco's editing, and it definately shows off here. This is a good piece of work for a rental night. It is not $2.99 wasted, IMHO.

Did I say I enjoyed this a lot? The wife thought it was silly, but I've always had a fondness for the silly things...

On an average basis, the sex was worth a 2.5, the two facials get 1.25 each for a 2.5, and the writing and the humor a 3.5, and lest we think this is by any means scientific, we'll come down somewhere near the middle with a solid rental rating of 3.20.