The Director Reviews... Who Killed Holly Hollywood?

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VCA Platium, 1994
Dir: John T. Bone

Playboy mag recommended this a month or so back, so I thought I'd take them up on it...

Christina Dior, Johnathan Morgan, John T. Bone, Madison, Peter North, Brittany O'Connell,, Marc Wallice, Terry Thomas, Crystal Wilder, Cumisha Amado, Brazil, Rick Blaine, Ron Jeremy

Johnathan Morgan and Christiana Dior are undercover cops and engaged to be married. They pull down the murder of Holly Hollywood, a bitchy porn starlet. The twisty plot follows through. I won't spoil it, though it wasn't the toughest thing to spot...

Brazil/Peter North

A flashback scene of Holly while she was still active in the business (read: not dead). It is a pretty short scene, but Peter (as Peter is wont to do) launches one from her crotch and hits her face. A good facial, not great, good. No penile contact after cumshot. Fade out.

Tami Monroe/Jon Morgan

As a cop, he busts Tami for soliciation. However, he makes her fuck him instead. (Will the plot twists never end?) She doesn't seem to not want to fuck him (as any right minded hooker would). As this is a John T. Bone film, she gets a very good facial.

Cumisha Amado/John T. Bone

This is the first time I've ever seen John T. in a sex scene. He must have really wanted Cumisha Amado (God knows why, she's not my cup of tea...) I mean really wanted her, because he came after literally a minute and a half. A decent facial.

Brittany O'Connell

Brittany poses nude for Christina's camera. (Christinahas gone undercover as a still porn photographer, to get on the sets) I am no fan of Brittany's. However, all I had to do was look at her here, as there was no sex involved, merely nude modeling. And who knew if plot points would come up!

Madison/Brittany O'Connell

I hate the way Madison looks now and I have already expressed my lack of enthusiam for Brittany, so forgive me. They don't pay me enough to watch this scene. No comment.

Crystal Wilder/Cumisha Amado/Terry Thomas

They model nude for Christina's camera. Then the sex starts. Terry seems to pay more attention to Cumisha than to his wife. He fucks Cumisha then cums on her ass.

This scene shocked me for two reasons. One, no facial. Two, no facial from Crystal Wilder. She has become such the one trick pony of facials, as has John Bone (Thank God for him; her I'm getting sick of), that their match didn't bring a facial struck me as strange.

Ron Jeremy/Christina Dior

Not a sex scene. He plays Joe North (Jim South?!?) and she decides to try to get into the business to get even deeper undercover. He takes a few nude photos of her, and makes some lewd comments and talks her out of it. I mention this because it is the only time you see Christina fully naked, and Ron doesn't fuck.

Christina Dior

Solo scene. While reviewing some porn footage, she masturbates. This is a non-explicit scene. She is wearing panties, and her hand is slipped under them. Is this gal a porn actress? Has she done anything else?

Crystal Wilder/Marc Wallice

Marc plays Clinton Darke, (who probably not so coincidentally wrote the movie -- a recent porn in-joke, writers casting "studs" as themselves in their movies) a bastion of self-pity if there ever was one. He pays friend Crystal Wilder her day rate to sleep with him. A bizarrely touching scene. He cums from her crotch and hits her face, tits and belly.

A porn movie that wants to be more. It is directed adequately by Mr. Bone who graces us with his presence and many facials. The acting is decent, and many performers are in non-sex roles.

I could have done without Cumisha Amado and Brittany O'Connell, but I suppose they're in the industry and are going to be used. Of course, this does not count as strikes against the movie in anyone's book, but my own, and the rating is not affected by their presence.

The plot is interesting in that the scenes concerning the industry ring wth a certain sadness and regret. Like the people realize they should be doing something else, but this is where they ended up. This is best exemplified by Marc Wallice's character. One can;t help but wonder how much Clinton Darke loathes himself for writing these movies, or if he is so content with himself that this is an ironic joke. Any ideas?

The cop plot is just plain silly, but works in the context of the movie. It moves things along and gets people into situations where stangers having sex is not so odd.

I give this a reluctant 3.35. The effort put into this from an acting, rather than fucking, standpoint puts it over the 3.00 limit.